How to live with your parents harmoniously as an adult
Living with your parents when you’re an adult can be both comforting & difficult at the same time. Whether you’re living with them to take care of them, or you moved back in because you need help or you moved in during the start of this pandemic & are stuck at home since, there are ways to make life better for everyone.
- Be ready to change up your habits
When you live with your parents, your habits may not often match their lifestyle or their habitual schedules. Let’s look at a simple example, where you prefer to have your breakfast at 11 AM ( that’s not a great idea in general but to each his own ) and they prefer to eat at 7 AM. Now, this may seem like a minuscule detail to us, but not to our parents. They have been living on that schedule longer than you have existed & so it would make everyone a lot happier if you just realigned your day a tad to fit theirs. Maybe you could eat at 8? Similarly, if you happened to smoke, keeping that outside of your home would be good for your parents’ health & mental peace. We’d rather change our habits than have our siblings tattle on us!
- Remember to lay down boundaries
You’re an adult with your own life & your own way of life. Your parents understand that too. But sometimes it’s hard for them to remember that the little bird has grown up. To make things easier on everyone, have an open conversation with your parents & set boundaries that everybody is comfortable with.
That’s not saying you need to put crime scene tape around your room but you get the idea.
- Be kind when you say “No”
You will be presented with activities & situations that you simply do not wish to partake in. When such a situation arises, it will do us good to remember to be gentle & kind when we turn them down. Maybe suggest postponing the activity to another day or calmly explain to them that you’re busy. If you feel like your parents are more on the understanding side, go ahead and tell them honestly that you do not enjoy the activity & maybe suggest something else you could do together. Sometimes being too honest ain’t the best.
- Eat your dinners together
Dinners are a great place to sit down & talk things through. If you’ve had a terrible day, I’m sure your parents could listen & possibly suggest solutions to the problems that loom over your mind. You could also use this time to get to know your parents & see what it’s like to walk a day in their shoes. Nothing brings people together like food & open conversations. But let’s remember to NOT START A FOOD FIGHT!!
- Don’t stay cooped up in your room all the time
Isolating yourself will not go down easy with your parents. But then again, that’s a terrible idea even for you. Lack of human interaction can be detrimental to your mental health & as much as you may feel lazy & unmotivated to get up out of your bed & interact, DO IT! You’re bound to find relief & strength in the company of your family.
- Practice small acts of kindness at home
Do small things around the house or for your parents. These small acts of kindness can bring great joy to your family. What’s more, their joy will spark happiness in your own mind. It doesn’t have to be something great. Even just tiny things like watering the plants, cooking them a meal, giving your mum a foot rub… just about anything will put a smile on their faces.
- Share your interests
Go ahead and introduce your family to your favourite activities. Watch your favourite tv shows with them, play them a piece on your piano or guitar or put on a full-blown karaoke night.
- Spend time with your friends
Since going out is out of the question right now, you can spend time with your friends on video call or watch a movie together online. Spending time with other people can be a nice break from the monotony. It can also help you resolve any feelings of pent-up anger or unrest.
- Realise that you are in one of the most supportive systems & enjoy it
Your parents are the people that love you unconditionally & are always there to back you up when you want to take the road less taken. Enjoy the fact that you live in such a warm cosy environment & use this energy to do better in all that you do. You can take risks, explore new things & never be afraid that there’ll be no one to catch you if you fall.
- Practice gratitude
Know that your parents are doing more than just putting a roof over your head. Understand the sacrifices they’ve made for you & appreciate the little things they do for you everyday & be grateful for it all. Letting yourself feel this gratitude & love is the easy way to inner peace.
While there are no shortcuts to easy living with your parents, a little can go a long way with your family. So start with the little things & build a better life for you and your family that loves you oh so much.